My thinking isn't in control anymore

I was so scared of post-partum depression. My aunt had post-partum psychosis. I was even more afraid of that. The fear made me not get pregnant for years. This was, until my coach pointed me towards my mental health and away from my busy mind making up lies about how bad pregnancy and post-partum would be. She pointed me towards all the evidence that I am well. That my body, without any external nudging could build a baby(no brain needed). How intelligent I am (without thinking). Full stop. That if there was something REALLY wrong, really truly wrong (like my mind was making up), I would know what to do. That any looping of my repetitive LOUD thinking was just that, thinking, or else there would be action. There was nothing I needed to do until I did. And I would know the difference. This was obvious when I went into labor. A moment I thought about probably 1,000 times. I just knew. Call it intuition, call it wisdom, call it inner knowing. I didn’t question it, I didn’t call someone to ask. The moment was nothing like I have anticipated. It was calm, and slow. I had all the answers at my disposal. I could access all of my inner knowing. I was not anxious, I was not scared, I was aware and focused. Just like my coach said. The obvious difference between thinking there’s something wrong and knowing nothing is. My mind told me for years how scary pregnancy would be. All the testing, all the picking and prodding how big I might get…the real experience was nothing like this. My mind stole years of time from me on this topic and others. I’ll never let it fool me again if there’s anything I can do about it.